Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 23:50:13 +0000

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We are not one for drama or hyperbole, but whoever tagged downtown’s iconic Golden Goose sign deserves castration by blowtorch. For starters.

On the bright side, vandals aren’t geniuses, and their tags are nicknames easily traced by law enforcement, so this particular moron could be getting a visit from the po-po. (The Gang Crimes unit at Metro was disbanded, but was reinstated, so there’s that.)

It would be a shame if the arrest involved a smidge of police brutality just so the perpetrator doesn’t forget such vandalism isn’t acceptable, especially when it involves a monument to Las Vegas history.

This loser’s goose is cooked.

Our friend Kerry B. (Whiskey Fever on Twitter) was the first to bring this asshattery to our attention.

The fact the Golden Goose still exists is a minor miracle.

The Golden Goose sign came down on Fremont Street after 43 years (most recently standing watch over the Glitter Gulch strip club) when its perch was demolished to make way for Circa Las Vegas.

The Golden Goose has been through some things.

The sign was donated to Tony Hsieh’s Downtown Project and it was refurbished and put on display south of Fremont East, at Fremont Street and 10th Street.

The sign its rotation, and mojo, back.

Now, we have some imbecile, bereft of talent or success or a clue, crapping on a beloved Las Vegas landmark.

Back in former Mayor Oscar Goodman’s heyday, he said those who deface structures with graffiti should have their thumbs cut off on television.

Castration, thumbs, whatever works.

Here’s hoping the Golden Goose can be repainted and the dipshit who vandalized it can be brought to justice, possibly with the assistance of a Taser or pepper spray or Belgian Malinois.

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 23:03:30 +0000

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Holsteins Shakes & Buns closed at Cosmopolitan in July 2024 and one thing we definitely aren’t going to do in this story’s opening paragraph is mention we told everyone the restaurant would close months before it was officially confirmed.

Now, Holsteins has shared it will open a new location in downtown Las Vegas, in what’s known as the Arts District.

Holsteins was mid, as the kids say, but we’re sure this new spot will be much better because we don’t want to be blacklisted or given a body cavity search every time we visit the place.

This Holsteins burger features kalbi glaze, crispy yams, nori furikake, tempura avocado and spicy mayo, any of which would be perfectly good rapper names.

Holsteins was at Cosmo for about 15 years, and is being replaced by a Mexican restaurant, Amaya Modern Mexican Restaurant. Amaya opens January 2025.

Holsteins, from Gen3 Hospitality, opens early spring 2025.

The new 2,800-square-foot Holsteins restaurant will be located next to a downtown favorite, Velveteen Rabbit.

From the news release, “The restaurant’s design will feature original brickwork, industrial concrete floors and a long bar, creating a hip atmosphere perfect for Las Vegas locals and visitors alike. Holsteins will offer cozy booths and tables, plus TVs for sports fans, making it the go-to spot for lunch, happy hour, dinner or late-night indulgence.”

Holsteins didn’t provide a rendering of the interior, so we just used the above description as a prompt so A.I. could take a stab at it.

You’re welcome, Gen3 Hospitality, we just saved you a metric ass-ton of rendering costs.

Gen3 Hospitality (previously Block 16 Hospitality), owned by longtime industry veteran Billy Richardson, also does the underwhelming Flour & Barley and Haute Doggery at Linq Promenade.

Richardson was also responsible for LBS Burger Joint at Red Rock Resort (closed), Pink’s Hot Dogs at Planet Hollywood (closed), The Barrymore at Royal Resort (closed), Public House at Grand Canal Shoppes (closed), Gallery Nightclub at Planet Hollywood (closed) and Marigold at Resorts World (closed after just six months).

Bless his heart for trying, though.

At some point, someone might want to take a step back and consider whether they’re cut out for this line of work. All due respect.

We’re pretty sure Billy Richardson is trying to step out from under his father’s shadow. His dad is Bill Richardson, owner of W.A. Richardson Builders, one of the most successful construction companies in Las Vegas. No pressure.

Anyway, props to Richardson and his team for not being one of those stories where a business says it’s looking for a new location but is never heard from again.

The Arts District is a little thirsty, but the bar for success is lower than a high profile location like Cosmopolitan, so that could work in Holsteins’ favor.

Holsteins will have a leg up on the competition just because of the brand recognition, but the proof will be in the burgers. And the furikake. Oh, like we were just going to let that go. Do you know this blog at all?

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 00:05:03 +0000

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The World Series of Poker (WSOP) has announced the 2025 dates for its popular series of tournaments: May 27 through July 16, 2025.

The WSOP will again be held at Horseshoe and Paris.

Oh, crap, that’s really not enough news for an entire blog post. Let the padding begin!

A.I. is getting better at hands. We’re all doomed.

There is a smidge more to the story, actually.

This will be the first time in many years the WSOP is under new ownership. Caesars Entertainment sold the WSOP to NSUS Group for $500 million.

The sale of WSOP was completed in Oct. 2024.

Caesars Entertainment acquired the WSOP brand in 2004 (Caesars Entertainment was Harrah’s Entertainment at the time) when the company owned Binion’s Horseshoe for a minute. Caesars acquired the Horseshoe brand as well. Now, Binion’s is just Binion’s.

Caesars Entertainment will continue to operate the World Series of Poker for the foreseeable future, so the ownership change is really only relevant if you’re asked who owns the WSOP on a game show.

Caesars is selling off “non-core” assets to pay down its debt. The company also sold Linq Promenade.

The World Series is sort of the Grand Poobah of poker tournaments.

For our fellow youths, “Grand Poobah” refers to someone of high importance. The term comes from the character Pooh-Bah in Gilbert and Sullivan’s “The Mikado,” a comic opera first performed in 1885.

The popularity of “comic operas” came to an abrupt halt following the advent of absolutely anything else to do but attending comic operas.

Our filler continues by regurgitating some information from a WSOP news release.

The WSOP has awarded more than $4 billion in prize money over the last 60 years.

In 2024, WSOP’s flagship event in Las Vegas attracted 229,553 entrants and more than $438 million in prize money was awarded.

In the last 60 years, 84% of WSOP winners wore hoodies and 91% rarely get invited to dinner parties due to their incessant grumbling.

No woman has ever won the World Series of Poker Main Event, mostly because they tend to be pleasant and bathe regularly.

We kid because we love!

WSOP’s series of tournaments culminates in the Grand Poobah (handy, right, fellow youths?) of the event’s aforementioned Main Event.

The Main Event Final Table happens July 15-16, 2025 inside the Horseshoe Events Center.

This is the part of our story where we humbly mention we shared two years before an official announcement the WSOP would be moving from Rio to the then-Bally’s, now Horseshoe.

Find out more about the World Series of Poker on the official Web site where you are invited to try and say the name Soheb Porbandarwala five times fast.

Note: If you’re bothered by the fact we just poked fun at a funny name, maybe you need to direct your indignation toward those culturally-appropriating asshats Gilbert and Sullivan. They exoticized Japan and their use of racial stereotypes is definitely cause for outrage, especially if it keeps us from being canceled for the sixth time this week. We are hereby going on the record as being completely in support of a boycott against “The Mikado.”

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 20 Dec 2024 23:03:57 +0000

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Venetian and Hyatt have announced a long-term licensing agreement, which means Venetian is now part of the Hyatt family of hotels, also known as World of Hyatt.

Such licensing agreements are common in Las Vegas hotels, and are mainly motivated by casinos gaining access to massive marketing databases to drive new business.

This is a a great partnership for Venetian and Palazzo, not so much for Rio, which is awkward, so naturally we’re talking about it.

Hyatt has hotels in 69 countries. If you thought we weren’t going to include that fun fact in our story, you do not know this blog at all.

There are several World of Hyatt hotels in Las Vegas (Hyatt Place Las Vegas, Hyatt Place Las Vegas at Silverton Village), but the only one that really matters is Rio.

Rio has invested many tens of millions in refreshing the off-Strip resort, also a World of Hyatt partner, now Hyatt fans get to choose between Venetian and Rio.

Rio has vastly improved recently, but still. It’s the Venetian.

On the bright side, Rio is getting an NBA arena out back, so that could change the game substantially.

What does Venetian’s partnership with Hyatt mean? Per the news release, “Soon, World of Hyatt members and eligible meeting and event planners will be able to earn and redeem loyalty points on qualifying stays, earn credit toward the Brand Explorer Award and, for World of Hyatt elite members, enjoy additional on-property benefits. With this long-term licensing agreement, Hyatt will offer more choice for rewarding travel experiences and stays in the all-suite resort at the heart of the Las Vegas Strip.”

Things can work in the other direction as well, with Venetian Rewards members getting Hyatt benefits.

Again, from the official announcement, “As part of this long-term licensing agreement, World of Hyatt will, in the future, offer elite Venetian Rewards members benefits within World of Hyatt. Additionally, in the near future, these two hospitality powerhouses will work together in the MICE (meetings, incentives, conferences, and exhibitions) and convention space to also complement each other’s strengths in group business.”

The convention thing is huge for Venetian because of its massive Venetian Expo (Venetian Convention and Expo Center, formerly the Sands Expo Convention Center). That’s the one Sheldon Adelson used to own. He’s the one who pretty much kicked the door in at the Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority offices when he heard they wanted to expand the Las Vegas Convention Center because it competed with his venue. Those were the days.

Hotel loyalty clubs are akin to casino loyalty clubs. People tend to frequent places where they can get perks for their repeat business. You know, loyalty.

A company like Hyatt brings a lot to the table in a partnership. Global reach, trust, better online visibility, operational expertise and economies of scale. Hyatt benefits by expanding its footprint in the world’s greatest destination, Las Vegas.

Hang in there, Rio. Maybe bringing back the “Masquerade Show in the Sky” isn’t such a bad idea after all.

Update (12/20/24): Everyone plays nice in Vegas.

We’re all friends here. 🤗

— Rio Hotel & Casino Las Vegas (@RioVegas) December 20, 2024

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 20 Dec 2024 01:24:03 +0000

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Art is subjective, but a recently-unveiled statue “honoring” former Las Vegas mayors Oscar and Carolyn Goodman is objectively worse than being jabbed in the eye with a syringe full of molten lava.

Las Vegas is known to have aggressively awful public art, but this trainwreck makes the Goodmans, mayors of Las Vegas for a quarter century between them (he did 12 years, she did 13), look like Colonel Sanders and Fiona from “Shrek.”

The artist responsible for this disrespectful disaster, Brian Hanlon, should be forced to refund the $750,000 he was paid, the sculpture should be scrapped and some elementary school kid should make a new one because it would have to be better than this clusterfailery.

Congrats to whoever these people are.

The 11-foot-tall statue of Oscar and Carolyn Goodman was first revealed Nov. 26, 2024 at Las Vegas City Hall.

There was a lot of hoopla.

We can only imagine the crowd in attendance was as stupefied as we were when first saw this monumental hot mess. Apparently, nobody said anything, presumably because the Goodmans are beloved and the unveiling was all about showing respect and appreciation for their years of public service.

We love and respect the Goodmans, too, which is why we’ll say it: They deserve better.

Carolyn Goodman is unrecognizable in this pitiful attempt at art.

Carolyn Goodman is arguably the most patient woman in the world. Hence, her not complaining publicly about this travesty.

Oscar Goodman’s likeness is a little bit better, but not by a lot.

Oscar Goodman’s middle name is Baylin. Hopefully, the City will be bailin’ on this artist in the future.

Presumably, it’s a better approximation to Oscar Goodman because the artist has had some practice with Oscar Goodman. Hanlon did another sculpture of Oscar Goodman on display at the Historic Fifth Street School, wherever that might actually be.

Somebody should’ve raised a red flag about commissioning Hanlon for this gig as he was responsible for another botched sculpture of Oscar Goodman inside Oscar’s Steakhouse at Plaza.

It’s as if Hanlon does all his sculpting with a Shake Weight while riding on a commercial airliner during heavy turbulence while wearing a blindfold.

This sculpture depicts Goodman with murderer Anthony Spilotro. We crop that part of the statue out so as to not glorify douchebaggery.

Seriously, this drawing on the wall of Oscar’s looks more like Oscar than the statue at City Hall.

This would sell for $7.6 million at Christie’s auction house. Related: Needs a banana.

Hanlon also did the Jerry Tarkanian statue at UNLV. Also a bust, but Tarkanian’s face is partially covered with a towel to avoid people noticing what a dud it is.

As if Hanlon knew his work would be deemed “peak suck,” he did an interview with the local news, explaining, “We had six months to do a sculpture that takes 18 months to build.” Honestly, it looks like it.

How did this statue come to exist? Who signed off? How has nobody stated publicly how awkward it is, along with being supremely disrespectful to the Goodmans and their legacy?

The statue was paid for by something called the Mayor’s Fund for Las Vegas Life. The people who donated to whatever that is (“an independent nonprofit that supports city programs and initiatives”) should ask to speak to a manager, or at least look into the market rate for tar and feathers.

This photo was shared by the City of Las Vegas and shows the Goodmans trying to keep their lunch down after viewing this statue for the first time.

The statue has a written message on its base: “In recognition and gratitude for your 25 years of exceptional leadership and dedication, elevating Las Vegas to new heights.”

The Goodmans did a lot to improve downtown (mayors oversee the City of Las Vegas, which doesn’t include The Strip, that’s Clark County, which doesn’t have a mayor), and these affable folks are a one-two punch of Las Vegas cheerleading and memorable quotes, both good and cringey, but entirely unforgettable.

Speaking of cringey, did nobody at the unveiling ceremony notice Carolyn Goodman’s freakishly long index finger? Oscar should have this artist whacked.

Oscar Goodman created a brand that transcended the somewhat boring job of mayor, representing mobsters as a lawyer, then saying vandals who use graffiti to deface property should have their thumbs cut off on television. He sort of wasn’t joking.

Like we said, a statue is appropriate, but the one they got? It’s right up there with some of the worst celebrity statues, ever.

Stories about piss-poor depictions of notables like Dwyane Wade and Cristiano Renaldo have gotten worldwide attention. Here are more examples of statue debacles.

The statue of the Goodmans is like the prank Sofia Vergara played on Simon Cowell, but this isn’t, you know, funny.

The Goodmans have been the face of Las Vegas for 25 years, they deserve to have recognizable faces on public art intended to honor them.

We trust the Goodmans are too classy to say their statue should be given a do-over by somebody who will do their 25 years of selfless dedication and leadership justice.

They didn’t even say anything when their bobbleheads were botched!

This bobblehead maker had one job.

Again, who’s approving these things?

Oy.

Here’s more about the Goodmans and their contributions to downtown.

The idea of a statue of the Goodmans was a wonderful gesture. The next wonderful gesture should be the revocation of “artist” Brian Hanlon’s license to carve. We assume that’s a thing.

Stop paying this person for bad art.

And start increasing funding of education in Nevada so people can learn art history so they can discern good art from atrocious art. What gives us the right to say what’s good art or bad? It’s a little something called a Liberal Arts degree. “Arts” is right in the name of it, hello.

We have also been the subject of great art.

Fun fact: Majestic Rep is home to one of the most valuable pieces of art in the world. //t.co/79oh0iM2v1 pic.twitter.com/AEBOM1NWuQ

— Vital Vegas (@VitalVegas) December 9, 2024

There is a glimmer of hope on the horizon. There’s a new Las Vegas art museum in the works. We shared the news about the museum, being driven by the efforts of Elaine Wynn, months before it was announced, of course.

The Las Vegas Museum of Art (LVMA) will be downtown, in Symphony Park, one of the areas where the Goodmans have had a lot of impact in terms of facilitating development. The museum is expected to open in 2028.

The Las Vegas Museum of Art will be a must-visit. It won’t compare to museums in real cities, but it will have actual art, unlike the testament to talentlessness currently outside Las Vegas City Hall.

The pigeons have a new target, and their droppings can only improve this failed attempt at paying tribute to two Las Vegas legends.

There’s a new mayor, Shelley Berkley, but things will never be quite the same. Las Vegas without a Goodman as mayor is like José Feliciano’s bank account would be if there were no Christmas.

Update (12/20/24): They’re not wrong.

Could be worse….. pic.twitter.com/AaNrX0nT0O

— Mark S (@Sugarortweetner) December 20, 2024

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Thu, 19 Dec 2024 00:19:36 +0000

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Oy, with the sports, already. That said, go sports!

The Ultimate Frisbee Association (UFA) is bringing a new pro team to Las Vegas, the Vegas Bighorns.

Yes, there’s “pro” frisbee league. We’re using quotation marks because we assume these players are paid about as much as the guy giving out breath mints and paper towels in casino restrooms. All due respect.

Bighorn sheep are common in Fremont petroglyphs, rock carvings named after downtown’s Fremont Street Experience, a gathering spot known for throngs of people dancing like nobody’s watching, unfortunately.

You made us Google it.

Most frisbee players make less than $100 a game. So, like the WNBA before Caitlin Clark.

Pro frisbee is sort of like other sports, just without people in the stands. Wow, this story got snarky so quickly.

Here’s a hype video that should rectify that!

The Vegas Bighorns haven’t been officially announced yet, but it’s not really a secret given there’s a Facebook page and Web site devoted to the team.

The story was first reported by Ultiworld, saying, “In a surprise move, the Ultimate Frisbee Association is adding a new franchise in the hottest market in professional sports: Las Vegas. The Vegas Bighorns will be the first new UFA team added since 2023, when the Houston Havoc joined the association.”

This, despite the fact we have put a temporary moratorium on sports in Las Vegas. Nobody listens. Everyone thinks moving to Las Vegas is going to make miracles happen, as it did with the Vegas Golden Knights. Attention all sports: That’s not a template. Yes, the Raiders only became a thing after moving, but these are flukes.

Las Vegas is a very small market and there are already plenty of sports to go around. Don’t get us started.

Take that, Las Vegas Desert Dogs, whatever sport that might be!

As Ultiworld notes, “To ultimate fans, this move may come as a surprise. Las Vegas did not send any club teams to the USA Ultimate series in 2024, and the city has only a small local disc organization. In 2023, Las Vegas Nuke competed in SoCal men’s sectionals but did not advance past that stage. There are no nearby marquee college programs to draw from.”

On the bright side, this won’t be the worst-attended pro sport in Las Vegas. That distinction goes to the Las Vegas Night Owls, a pickleball team we only realized exists three minutes ago.

The Vegas Bighorns haven’t said where they’re playing yet, but it’s expected they’ll be part of the UFA’s 2025 season. Tryouts are happening Feb. 1, 2024 and the team roster will be announced March 2025.

Somebody see if Caitlin Clark’s got any free time coming up.

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Tue, 17 Dec 2024 01:02:24 +0000

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If you’ve never been to the casinos in Primm, about a hour’s drive south of the Las Vegas Strip, you may never have heard of Whiskey Pete’s. This is good, as you’ll be spared the heartbreak of hearing it’s closing.

This is among a number of changes coming to Primm’s collection of hotel-casinos, the others being Buffalo Bill’s and Primm Valley.

They all fall under the umbrella of Primm Valley Casino Resorts, owned by Affinity Gaming, the same company that runs Silver Sevens in Las Vegas.

No, it’s not Excalibur, it’s Whiskey Pete’s. They were going to call it Whiskey Peter’s. We’ve all been there!

No date is available for the closure of Whiskey Pete’s, but it’s coming, per an executive overseeing the Primm casinos.

Buffalo Bill’s will remain open, but will be closed Monday through Thursday.

The focus will now be on Primm Valley Resort & Casino, which will be getting some love with additional investment and changes intended to “better reflect the product.”

The changes at Primm Valley will include a new concept from Denny’s.

Buffalo Bill’s is the one that used to have a roller coaster. It’s unlikely to come back. Get used to disappointment.

While the casinos in Primm are trimming back operations to improve profitability, the good news is these changes will not impact any jobs. Staff will just be absorbed by other parts of the organization.

Primm has been through a lot in recent years, ditto Jean (between Primm and Las Vegas). Terrible’s casino, once the Gold Strike, was demolished in 2023.

Primm has always been that place where travelers stop to gamble if they get the itch and can’t wait to get to Las Vegas.

Drove by yesterday. She isn’t the Wild West-looking place I first visited at 20 years old. I guess you never forget your first!

RIP Whiskey Pete’s. pic.twitter.com/tEJX4ryB7I

— Bill Sandweg (@Notbillsandweg) December 16, 2024

One of our fondest memories of playing in Primm was when we met a guy at a craps table who turned out to be the screenwriter of “The Cooler.”

Whenever a casino closes, an angel loses its wings. Although, Whiskey Pete’s didn’t have wings. It had Pitabilt, IHOP and Subway.

There are lots of other Las Vegas content creators who visit Primm much more frequently than we do (we typically end up at M Resort on our way to Primm), so follow them on their social media platforms.

If Whiskey Pete's hadn't gotten all those Californians back to even before crossing the state line, maybe it wouldn't be closing. pic.twitter.com/LKvpnqT0mM

— John Mehaffey (@John_Mehaffey) December 16, 2024

John Mehaffey has shared a number of good posts about the Primm resorts, including the rumor Primm Valley will get Whiskey Pete’s hotel furnishings after it closes.

If what I heard is accurate, WP's hotel furnishings will move to PVR's hotel after a renovation. I'm surprised that Buffalo Bill's will close midweek. I predict a table game solution will return to PVR. It hasn't had live tables, ETGs, or open hotel rooms since December 2022. //t.co/qTeEisvOIv

— John Mehaffey (@John_Mehaffey) December 15, 2024

Here’s more from Mehaffey about the casinos in Primm.

Thanks to our friends on Twitter (including @LasVegasLocally) for kicking us in the ass to get the full story about what’s going on with the Whiskey Pete’s closure. Nothing gets by the Las Vegas Twitter community.

We’ve heard Whiskey Pete’s could close as soon as tomorrow (Dec. 17, 2024). That escalated quickly.

Update (12/17/24): Whiskey Pete’s in Primm closed on Dec. 17, 2024. In case you’re curious, the infamous Bonnie and Clyde car sits in the food court area of Buffalo Bill’s.

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Tue, 17 Dec 2024 00:04:35 +0000

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‘Tis the season for WTF.

Today we learned CityCenter, at some point, was renamed “Aria Campus.”

Presumably, because the name “CityCenter” was deemed just too damn sexy.

The opening of CityCenter was the exact moment when Las Vegas took a turn for the shrug.

We thought the name “Aria Campus” might just be a term used internally at MGM Resorts, but nope, it’s out there in the wild. We just missed the change entirely, and we claim to know everything.

On the Aria Web site, it says: “Described as a city within-a-city, the Aria Campus (formerly known as CityCenter) [is] comprised of Aria Resort & Casino and Vdara Hotel & Spa.”

Which is weird, because CityCenter covered not only Aria and Vdara, but also the Waldorf Astoria, Veer Towers and Shops at Crystals.

The Internet believes the name change happened in 2019, yet we had never heard about this alleged rebrand until today in a post from a popular Twitter account marking the birthday of Aria, which opened on Dec. 16, 2009.

OTD 2009 Aria Resort and Casino opened in CityCenter (now Aria Campus) on the #LasVegas Strip. It was named Aria due to its placement as the central feature of CityCenter, as arias are focal points in operas. pic.twitter.com/hOd5Rh3voU

— _GrandpaD__Old School Vegas✨ (@_GrandPaD) December 16, 2024

The weird thing is nobody calls CityCenter the Aria Campus, just like nobody calls the Las Vegas airport “Harry Reid International Airport” and nobody calls David Copperfield “not a sexual predator.”

To help avoid confusion, do not ask your rideshare or taxi driver to take you to the Aria Campus. Please ask them to deliver you to the individual destination within the Aria Campus. Sorry, we are never getting used to that.

Here are some shorthand ways of referring to the entities within the Aria Campus.

Aria: “The one that started the trend of Las Vegas casinos looking like business parks.”

Vdara: “The one without a casino, so who cares?”

Waldorf Astoria: “There’s a Whataburger and some terrible pizza out front if you’re into that.”

Shops at Crystals: “You can’t afford it.”

Veer Towers: “The condos that look shitfaced.”

Average condo price at Veer Towers: $780,000. Otherwise known as pocket change if you have a sugar daddy.

We hope that helps!

Here’s a nuanced and in-depth story about CityCenter, so naturally, we didn’t read all of it.

Thanks to the miracle of A.I., two robots are happy to provide us with an audio overview of the CityCenter, sorry, Aria Campus, saga.

Scott Roeben · CityCenter Deep Dive

Aria Campus is a fascinating part of Las Vegas history, including Harmon Tower, the hotel tower that was dismantled before it ever opened. Read more. Yes, you have to read, but it’s mostly pictures, so you’ll live.

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Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 13 Dec 2024 09:14:08 +0000

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In-N-Out Burger, the fast food juggernaut with a massive cult following, is bringing a massive location to The BLVD, a new mall replacing the Hawaiian Marketplace on the Las Vegas Strip.

The restaurant will span 8,000 feet, making its dining room the largest in the chain’s history.

The In-N-Out is set to open in 2026, which is a flipping head-scratcher. It’s not the Taj Mahal. It’s not even the Garage Mahal. LFG, already.

In-N-Out fries are one of the best ways to make new friends.

Anyway, In-N-Out officially confirmed the new location on its Instagram page. Instagram is sort of the visual Twitter, but with an alien owner rather than a Bond villain.

The announcement said, “This restaurant will be over 8,000 square feet on one level and will offer dining room service and outdoor seating. The dining area will be larger than our typical restaurant, and special In-N-Out signage will feature our retro looks throughout the years. We’re also excited that a unique Company Store showcasing some popular In-N-Out items will open alongside the restaurant!”

You can tell In-N-Out is excited about the BLVD location because of the exclamation point and the use of “over” when they mean “more than.”

While the In-N-Out confirmation is way ahead of the restaurant’s scheduled opening date, the company probably needed to put the kibosh on A.I. renderings, many of which made the restaurant look like a three or four story monstrosity even more far-fetched than renderings for the A’s ballpark. Or as the kids call it, horseshittery.

Here are the renderings shared by In-N-Out Burger on Instagram. Instagram is the social media platform sort of like TikTok, the difference being Instagram isn’t being banned due to xenophobia.

We use A.I. renderings because real renderings are sort of boringish.

If you’re unfamiliar with In-N-Out Burger, the chain got its start in 1948 and was founded by Harry and Esther Snyder in Baldwin Park, California.

It’s touted as having been California’s first drive-thru hamburger stand. For many years, the restaurant was limited to California, but today In-N-Out operates more than 380 locations across a number of states including California, Nevada, Arizona, Utah, Texas, Oregon, Colorado and possibly others we didn’t have time to copy-and-paste from Wikipedia. In-N-Out is mostly on the left, or smarter, side of the country, Texas being the exception.

But Nevada is the most important location, because that’s the state containing the Las Vegas Strip, a place lacking good burgers for some reason. It’s pretty much about Gordon Ramsay Burger at Planet Hollywood and No Pants at Caesars Palace. Slim pickings. Ditto pizza. All the good pizza is downtown except for Superfrico at Cosmo and the new Swingers at Mandalay Bay.

There are a number of things that make In-N-Out Burger stand out: 1) The burgers are delicious, 2) the fries are widely criticized, and 3) there are random escort appointment times printed on the bottom of In-N-Out’s drinking cups.

We believe in the separation of church and everything.

We can help with the fries thing.

Just remember these four words: “Fries light well, please.” This phrase will change your life.

Just trust us on this one. We are a noted tuberous roots expert.

Do you know this blog at all?

Our high school band, Tuberous Roots, is credited with being the first all-virgin boy band.

We trust the In-N-Out at BLVD will offer its much-touted “secret menu” items. Let’s just say “secret” is used very loosely here.

Pretty much everyone knows the “Animal Style Burger” (grilled onions, extra spread and mustard-cooked beef patties), “Protein Style Burger” (low-carb option where the burger is wrapped in lettuce instead of a bun) and “Animal Style Fries” (topped with cheese, grilled onions and spread).

The people who order these items are what’s known in the restaurant business as “weirdos.” We’re pretty sure these orders slow everything down, so please don’t do that.

When In-N-Out comes to BLVD, it will be the second location on the Las Vegas Strip. The other is at Linq Promenade. Yes, we broke the news that location was in the works, not that everything has to be about us.

You can always spot an In-N-Out because of their signature crossed palm trees, which we’re pretty sure is a heretical abomination in the eyes of the Lord, but we try not to judge.

Anyway, the trees are a nod to In-N-Out founder Harry Snyder’s love of the 1963 movie “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World.” In the film, palm trees marked buried treasure. The movie’s trees were shaped like a “W,” with the middle two crossed.

“It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World” is set in a mythical world where there is only one person of color in the entire United States of America.

Anyway, the In-N-Out at the BLVD shopping complex is some time off, and it’s also unclear when BLVD opens completely.

Everyone’s best guess is “early 2025.”

BLVD will have a range of shopping options, because if there’s anything Las Vegas is lacking, it’s shopping. Don’t get us started. Then again, anything’s better than the Hawaiian Marketplace, a venue less inviting than a Porta-Potty at food festival hosted by Taco Bell.

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The post Big-Ass In-N-Out Coming to BLVD and Why You Should Stop Whining About the Fries appeared first on Vital Vegas.

Vital Vegas

Scott Roeben — Fri, 13 Dec 2024 06:34:41 +0000

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Casino giant Caesars Entertainment has handed over the keys to the Linq Promenade mall to TPG Real Estate and the Investment Management Platform of Acadia Realty Trust. Just when you thought malls couldn’t get more boring, this happens.

On the bright side, Caesars Entertainment got a $275 million windfall for the sale, which should allow the company to lower the “holds” on its slot machines, and by that we mean “pay down its debt.

Caesars made a $275 million prepayment of its “Term Loan B” due 2030 with the proceeds of the sale. This payment lowers the Caesars Entertainment debt to a paltry $12.4 billionish. The sale of the WSOP brand will drop that down another $500 million over time, presumably.

What? In 2014, these women worked as servers at Tilted Kilt, a venue in the Linq Promenade, the subject of this story.

Caesars Entertainment did some financial footwork back in Feb. 2024 related to refinancing its debt.

The sale is part of a recent effort to sell off “non-core” assets in order to pay down debt and reduce interest payments, the bane of any public company’s existence.

We don’t really understand all the granular financial details, but we challenge you to not become aroused when reading this sentence: “The notes will be guaranteed on a senior secured basis by each existing and future wholly-owned domestic subsidiary of the company that is a guarantor with respect to the company’s senior secured credit facilities.”

You may need to take a pregnancy test, just saying.

Here’s what that means in English, which we wrote completely on our own and without the assistance of ChatGPT, probably: The notes (a type of debt or loan) are backed by a strong guarantee. The guarantee comes from the company’s current and future subsidiaries in the U.S. that the company fully owns. These subsidiaries are already acting as guarantors (or co-signers) for the company’s other major loans. So, the same subsidiaries will also be responsible for ensuring these notes are paid back.

You just got pregnant twice, alert the media.

Caesars has shed about a quarter of its debt since Eldorado Resorts bought the company in 2020. Yes, during the fricking pandemic. That was a miracle nobody talks about, including us, because we’re still in shock they pulled it off.

The sale of Linq Promenade, formerly a stinky alley between the former Imperial Palace (now The Linq Las Vegas Hotel + Experience) and Flamingo, was announced in Oct. 2024.

Honestly, if you don’t know where Linq Promenade is, would a photo of Linq Promenade really help all that much?

What does the sale mean to you? Not a damn thing, probably.

Linq Promenade wasn’t really part of the Linq casino proper, so we’re fairly sure one couldn’t use or spend Caesars Rewards loyalty points there.

The High Roller observation wheel is still owned by Caesars Entertainment, ditto the zipline over the scenic Linq Promenade. “Scenic” meaning rooftop A/C equipment and pigeon poop, of course.

What’s up next for a sale? There have been rumblings for some time Caesars Entertainment might sell a Strip casino, but there are no current plans to do so. Reminder: Everything is for sale in Las Vegas at the right price.

Caesars still has a page on its Web site about Linq Promenade, but we assume that will redirect in 3…2…

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